Emotional intelligence is the ability to notice and name your feelings, thoughts, and wants while they are happening before you take action. It is the ability to integrate your thinking brain with your emotional brain in order to make better choices for your own well-being and self care.
Have you ever stood in front of the refrigerator and asked “what do I feel like eating?” I have done this so many times and not really feeling a hunger sensation in my body but my emotions were hungry. Have you ever reacted to an email at work? You read a reply and feverishly typed another reply only to regret having sent the angry response that evening when you thought more about the situation? These examples are our emotions taking over our actions. So often, we are unaware that many of the small choices we make during the day are impacting the people around us because of our emotional maturity.
What does an emotional intelligent woman look like when it comes to the areas of well-being?
She has a clear sense of who she is and her purpose in life. She is financially free and feels secure about her future. She is not waiting for Price Charming to come and pay her bills. She has deep intimacy in in her life. This could be with a partner or with a few select friends. She has time for social connections because she has boundaries to say NO to the people, places, and things that do not serve her highest good. She is in a healthy body meeting her own standards. She knows her vital signs (blood pressure, cholesterol level, BMI) and is up to date on her yearly health checks. Finally, she participates in her community by giving back her time, treasure and talent. She is connected into the greater good all because she has a strong foundation of emotional well-being which leads to a balanced life.
Do we know women like this?
I know a few, and although not perfect in every well-being dimension, her deep self-awarenss through emotional intelligence always gets her back to center when she gets off the balance beam.